My Uncle songed it. He songs everything.
Everyone thinks the lady’s pond in easy,
Never any queue nor male eyes a-sleazy
But what they don’t know is what lurks within
Alcohol free, tits out, lack of din.
We arrived at midday with beers and a vest,
To a warped utopia, old nakedness
Lez-be friends I wanted to be
But non of the ladies wanted to friend me.
Chorus
But the Victorian water will always be fair
Bottomless, bottomless but thankfully not topless.
Swim like they did in the 1920s, yeah
Let’s get hysterical and talk about Freud!
Should I strip off my protective bikini
Mother Goose and chicklets, dreamy scenery
Thrilling conversation, laughing is a riot
She’s looking at me and saying “be quiet!”
Ok, Yes I will obey the sign
I’ll keep the noise down, my sounds will be mine
But in return, you naked old prune
Respond to the signs that say you can’t be nude.
Chorus
But the Victorian water will always be fair
Bottomless, bottomless but thankfully not topless.
Swim like they did in the 1920s, yeah
Let’s get hysterical and talk about Freud!
I like nakedness as much as Eve and Adam
Before God came down, like a clothing madman
Get naked if you wanna, at least for a while
Everyone would be happier wearing nothing but a
smile.
But a note to the naked, the ones at the pool
I accept your lack of clothes, let this be the rule
So on this day, when I want to laugh at the ducks
Let me do this in peace, without your look of muck
Chorus
The Victorian water will always be fair
Bottomless, bottomless but thankfully not topless.
Swim like they did in the 1920s, yeah
Let’s get hysterical and talk about Freud!